Privileged Customers Only

Gasp!!  You disagree?!   What, you don't trust me?  You think I'm gonna steal all your bucks and run?   Good grief.  Some people are just soooo paranoid.

Well, I'll tell you what.   Because I'm such a terrific person, and hate to see such a wise and prudently intelligent customer leave in a huff, I'll let you have another whack at it.  Here's another, more ...*easy to follow*... agreement that I'm sure you'll be able to put your name to:

I do hereby agree that I will never think any evil thoughts or harbor any sociopathic intentions against anyone in particular, for any reason whatsoever, even if the other guy is a real jerk who cuts me off in traffic and is just a real nicompoop.  Furthermore, I intend to always look both ways before I cross a street, especially when it's a busy one.  Let it be known that I hereby do solemnly swear that Mr. Potato was the coolest toy ever and that Tickle-me-Elmo is the stupidest invention every invented by a stupid inventor.  I also agree that this agreement does not agree me to any agreement that I may agree to agree with, even if I'm just pretending to agree to the agreeing of the agreement.  Oh ya, and I also hereby agree that people who ask for money on the internet are the smartest and most incredibly intelligent people I've ever heard of.  I lastly agree that if I don't agree to this agreement that I am a chicken who lacks the brainpower of a mushroom (if mushrooms had brains).

Name:
Date: 

[I AGREE]

[I STILL DISAGREE]


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